I am currently sitting on the coach eating coconut frosting. Its from a can and not terribly good. At least I am eating it off cake, and not from the can.
I have this issue with emotional eating - see Friday's post - and apparently think the best way to solve my sad feelings about our lack of a baby, lack of disposable income, my student loans, our unsold house and the lack of a new job for me is to eat frosting. And a little bit of kind of dry cake. I am a terrible cake baker, which is sad because I'm generally good with the oven.
I vacillate a) being happy to be gainfully employed in a fairly low stress job where I have awesome coworkers and a pretty high level of flexibility and all the autonomy I can ask for (are you asking what I am complaining about??), though a pretty long (train, again what am I complaining about) commute and low salary (OK, that I can complain about) and b) being really fricking annoyed that I, with a masters and ABD from an extremely respectable program in my field, from an extremely respectable (and unfortunately extremely expensive) university, and a few years of work experience in a reasonably respectable position at said university have had 1.5 (one real and one terrible phone) interviews in the last 6.5 months. I have applied to 9 jobs at Rutgers and at least half a dozen elsewhere. And I'm really qualified for at least a third (I admit I am aiming high, see student loan debt issue above)!
I know I sound like a) a raving lunatic and b) an institutional egotist (really I'm not. I was a public school kid until my masters and all through my 22 grad classes was the public school voice of reason when people said things during case studies like "well, if I had that problem in undergrad, I'd go see the dean." What? What? What undergrad at a big state school knows who the Dean of the damn school is much less can REACH them?!) and c) a whiner.
Ok, I am whining.
I feel a little better now.
I guess I can put away the cake and get to the dog park.