After sleeping in, popping by the (quite nice) hotel gym to lift, and watching some HGTV (mmm) we walked over to the Public Market for lunch. I got a chicken sandwich. It came with mayo. I put some on. Now, let's note, I rarely eat mayo, and when I do, it is usually horseradish mayo.
Fast forward 90 minutes. Rumble in the tummy. Odd. I can't even tell you the last time I had an upset stomach so I didn't know what to make of this. I'll spare you the details of the ensuring bathroom trips, but it was getting worse and worse. I spent most of our Underground tour keeping an eye on the exits in case I needed to make a run for it. By 5 pm, I just didn't want to move anymore so we headed to the bus to the airport for our 10:30 pm flight.
Within 2 minutes after deboarding the bus, I was getting acquainted with the trash can. Have you ever looked inside a public trashcan on the sidewalk at the airport? Gross. Really gross. A lovely Port of Seattle Police officer asked if I needed the fire company (I assume he meant ambulance by that) but my claim of food poisoning was enough to send him on his way (by this point, I have decided it was the mayo that caused this).
So inside we go...I got some Pepto from the little stand and was thinking about dinner since I was feeling a little better (seeing as all I'd eaten all day was the chicken sandwich, some fries, and a bite of chocolate). 7:30 ish, I got acquainted with the airport bathroom. A passerby knocked on the stall to check on me, which was sort of nice. Then it occurred to me I needed to stay on the DL so no one quarantined me for Swine Flu (I have no idea if this was a realistic fear, but at the time it seemed reasonable).
That should be it right? There can't be anything left in my stomach. Right? Since I never got to dinner? Ok. Over the next hour and a half, I had a tortilla to help settle my stomach and ease the cramping...and 9:30ish, I got to run down the hall (since the closer one had a line) to visit the porcelain god again. Shoot me. At this point, tortilla aside, its just dry heaving, so I decided to just stop trying to eat anything despite my headache from not eating for over 9 hours. Ignoring my thirst, I tried to sleep through the flight (no bueno).
By the time we landed in Philly, got home, napped for 4 hours, and made it to the grocery store, I was completely lightheaded from the lack of nutrients. Not to make light of eating disorders, but I don't know how bulimics do it. A bowl of pineapple, a slice of bread, some jelly beans, and a bit of cereal later, I finally feel functional. (Though am still parked on the couch since my back is so sore, I surmise from fighting my stomach convulsions for 10 hours, tons of slouching while felt crummy, and "sleeping" awkwardly on the plane).
Fun.
More cheery vacation updates to come.
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